Health & Medical Self-Improvement

How to Deal with Anger

Anger is a damaging emotion.
It robs us of peace of mind.
Anger leaves us feeling disturbed and often leaves a legacy of depression.
At times anger can feel overwhelming and we can seem powerless to stop it.
Firstly we need to feel that anger is a bad thing.
If we sincerely want to try and control anger then it becomes possible.
If we feel anger is a good thing, something that is justifiable then it is likely to come often.
Sri Chinmoy writes on the harmful effect of anger: "Anger is a great obstacle.
The after-effect of anger is frustration and depression.
We should take anger as a thief.
Its very nature is to steal.
We have love inside us and it is our treasure.
If we allow anger, the thief, to enter into us, then it will immediately steal our inner treasure.
Secondly we must feel that anger is not an inherent part of ourselves but something that it is up to us whether we allow to enter in us or not.
If we step back for a moment we can see that anger is not part of our nature.
It is up to us whether we allow it or not.
Thirdly it is important to remember that when we get angry we will never achieve what we want to.
If we were to get very angry with a person, even if it may be justified, the other person is likely to respond in a way that is defensive.
They may respond in kind and then the situation can escalate.
If we are dealt with badly e.
g buying something from a shop.
If we present our argument in a polite and reasonable way then the shop owner feels compelled to help our reasonable request.
If we respond in a very angry way then most people don't want to deal with the situation.
They are likely to respond in kind.
It is like creating a barrier between ourselves and somebody else.
Fourthly if we do feel anger come upon us then the first thing to do is not to respond immediately.
Words have tremendous power.
If we speak when angry it is easy to regret it later.
We can just try to breathe slowly.
The American president Thomas Jefferson "When angry count to ten before you speak.
If very angry, count to one hundred.
" This is wise advice because often by the time we have counted to 100 the anger has subsided and we can see the situation in a clearer way.
Breathing slowly has a powerful effect on our thoughts and slows them and our emotions down.
Another thing we can try is to try to bring to the fore our own inner peace.
If we practise meditation or breathing exercises we can bring peace into our system.
Through meditation we can learn to control our thoughts and still the mind.
We come to realise our inner nature is peaceful.
Thought are like waves on an ocean.
They are only transient and not part of our real nature.
Thus if we can bring to the fore inner peace we can then remain unaffected by emotions like anger.

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